Ten Keys To
Personal Power
Here are ten keys to developing yourself
into a fulfilled and effective human being.
As you accomplish each of the items, you will find people are attracted
to you and you become a more effective leader. You probably only have
to work on some of these items. Choose the ones you most want to change
and work on them daily. These psychological principles have been scientifically
validated and are based on the work of Albert Ellis, PhD.
(1) Do what you enjoy doing rather
than what other people think you ought to do in life. It would be nice
if other people approved of what you do but it is not necessary to your
happiness for you to be loved and approved of by almost everyone for
almost everything you do. You know what it is that makes you happy,
that makes life enjoyable and this is what you should do.
(2) To become increasingly competent, try to better your own performance.
Do things because they bring pleasure and rewards, but give up the notion
of trying to be thoroughly competent, adequate and achieving. Try to
do, rather than do perfectly. Accept failures as undesirable but not
dreadful. You are a worthwhile, valuable person because you exist as
a human being, not because of how well you do something. You are worthwhile
in yourself, quite apart from your performance.
(3) Accept that you are a fallible human being and therefore likely
to make mistakes. You will be able to learn from your mistakes
and be increasingly successful as a result. Because you can accept that,
as a human being, you are fallible, you will find it completely unnecessary
to blame yourself for anything, for self-blame is completely unhelpful
and destructive.
(4) When conditions are not as you would like
them to be, wherever possible, change them for the better.
When, for the moment, things cannot be changed, you accept them calmly,
realizing that anger and frustration would be making you miserable all
for nothing. It would be nice if things were going the way you want,
but if they are not, it is not terrible, horrible or catastrophic. Accept
the situation and determinedly work to improve it.
(5) Feed positive, happy thoughts into your mind. You will
accept more and more strongly that you are responsible for your emotions,
that you decide whether you will be happy or miserable. It is not external
events that make you happy or sad, but the attitude you take to these
events. Your misery is caused by your irrational thinking and the negative
sentences you speak to yourself.
(6) Do not worry about future problems and
dangers, many of which are quite imaginary. You will be able
to determine the real dangers about the things you fear and see and
the probabilities of their actually occurring. Most of the things we
worry about never happen, so we make ourselves miserable for nothing.
Practice each day dismissing ·what if· scenarios from your mind and
you will find yourself becoming more and more successful in overcoming
such pointless worry.
(7) Instead of avoiding them, face up to the
difficulties and responsibilities of life. You will be able
to determine for yourself what the truly necessary activities of life
are, and, no matter how unpleasant they may be, you will be able to
perform them unrebelliously and promptly. As you do so, you will feel
an ever growing sense of happiness and accomplishment.
(8) Strongly reject the idea that the past
is all important and you will realize very powerfully that
just because something once strongly affected you, there is no reason
why it should continue to do so indefinitely. You are a different person
now from the one you were in the past and you can now successfully cope
with things which may have previously upset you.
(9) Increase the frequency, with which you
accept people and things as they are, seeing that compromise
and reasonable solutions are necessary. You will be able to give up
the notion that it is catastrophic if perfect solutions to life's problems
are not found.
(10) Each day make definite attempts to become
vitally absorbed in some persons or things outside your self.
To make our lives happy and fulfilling we need a purpose.
I request that you work on these keys and enjoy the process. You
will be amazed at how much your life improves and how much you grow.
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- A
Solution Coaching
&
Training, LLC
- —Stan
Mann, C.P.C.
- 15945
Oak, Suite 20
Livonia MI 48154
Ph: 734-261-0550
[NY time]
Fax: 734-437-0108
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